Park gets ‘Pink’ Makeover

Local residents and Park users were surprised to wake up to a rather different view of Ellington Park this morning.  Large swathes of the Park have been re-turfed with an unusual new grass, known by its Latin name, Stultus Roseus, which is pink rather than the traditional green.  The grass, imported all the way from Narrburg in Germany, has never been grown here in the UK – until now!

A delighted Friends of Ellington Park Chairperson, Beverley Perkins said, “It’s actually more maroon than pink. We love it – it brings some extra colour to the Park!”.

A delighted Beverley in the Park this morning
A delighted Beverley in the Park this morning

On the face of it, this is an experiment which is being tested for purely aesthetic grounds – to make the Park look prettier.  But there are serious reasons for the sudden introduction of Stultus Roseus in Ramsgate’s most prominent park, as Dr Avril Premier, of the Institut de Crotte, in Paris, explains:  “We have conducted rigorous scientific examinations into this unique species and have recently discovered that dogs are much less likely to use it as a toilet – it is to do with the colour pink”.

Dr Premier continued: “But of course, if a dog still decides to defecate on the new grass, then at least it will stand out more than when the grass was green, which makes it easier for dog owners to clear up, and for members of the public to avoid”.

According to Beverley, there is yet another, less obvious, advantage:  “Stultus Roseus grows very slowly in comparison to normal grass – it grows to a maximum of 5 inches per year, whereas the old grass could grow that high in the space of a week if there was enough rain” – a factor that Beverley hopes will help the Council to maintain the Park in an era of cutbacks.

“We would welcome feedback from the public on Ellington Park’s new look.  If it’s really poorly received, then we’ve been informed that it can be removed and replaced with the old grass as early as 2nd April”.